The Annie B. (Batobalani) Chronicles
The adventures and misadventures of a ‘not so average’ Pinay trying to make it in the cosmopolitan city of Dubai.
Guess what? After sending out thousands of my CV thru the internet, signing up with more than a dozen headhunters and going thru never-ending interviews…… I FINALLY HAVE A JOB!!! Mabrook to me! Dizzizit!!!! The beginning of my life-long dream: to become a professional executive worldwide. At last, my inborn talent – the gift of have or chicka in our native language. I am now officially a P.A. – not Production Assistant, not secretary, not public administration and definitely not secretary – but a Personal Assistant – to the Managing Director of Media Minds, a leading Public Relations company in the far, up, up and away Dubai Media City.
My British boss looksalike Harrison Ford – as in the Indian Jones. He’s not only handsome, but also kind and appreciative. He values my work and is always satisfied with everything I do. The best things he like about me is my coffee. He’s still drinks Starbucks every morning, but after the original coffee is finished, he tells me to refill his cup with my very own Annie B. Coffee Mix. How clever noh?!!!
As my boss is always out of the office – either travelling or during presentations or checking out the latest sale in the mall – I barely have anything to do. Honestly, my work is petiks – comfortable manageable for the eight hour – work everyday. I can actually finish everything within 3 hours. The rest of the day is just busy-busy-han for me. Most of the time, to kill time and meet new friends at the same time, I chat online and actively signed on to Friendster. This, I believe, improves my communication skills, boost my confidence level, and increase my chance of getting a new boyfriend and – promote world peace. Yes, hitting birds with one stone.
Chatting is fun – not only do meet new people from different cultures, but I also getting to re-invent myself. But don’t get me wrong – I do not lie in chatting – I only enhance my already pleasing personality. Whenever asked, I do a little subtraction with my waistline and some addition to my bustline – hahaha – fun isn’t it? There are times I get too passionate and chat with three to five different people at the same time while typing some documents for my boss. That’s what you call multinational-tasking, I guess. Sometimes I mix my chatting with my boss’ documents. One time, I typed, “Our campaign aims to target 5’2”, smooth but chubby Filipina in the U.A.E. which covers more than 75% of the population.” Hahaha – it totally didn’t make sense. My boss noticed my mistake but I quickly told him I was carried away with his marketing plan. I know it was a big boo-boo and I’m being careful now in juggling my chatting versus my official work.
Anyway, among the seven different guys that I chat with online, there’s this Filipino guy that has caught the fancy of my eyes. He’s really catch my attention because not only he’s a kabaya, but we have a lot of things in common. His profile reads. “175cm tall, 75 kilos, a resident of the UAE for five years now, mestizo, a hopeless romantic and a rebel without a cause…” I’m picturing Robin Padilla in my mind already. And he listens to jazz music like Kenny G – such a sensitive soul! I bet he’s the type showers women with dozens of flowers and takes them to candlelight dinners. We haven’t swapped pictures yet but something tells me he’s the one. We’ve been chatting for almost three weeks now and he’s suggesting that we finally meet in person thru an E.B (EyeBall). I haven’t said yes coz I told him my waistline is 23” and that my bustline is 36”. I have lost weight really fast and look for a triple wonder bra before I say yes to his EB invitation.
Tick…tock..tick…tock…It’s still 10 minutes before 6:00pm – more time to kill before my carlift arrives and be able to go home. My boss is also pretending to be busy. I could see the reflection of his computer monitor thru the window beside him. It’s an online poker site. Whew! More guys are buzzing me for a chat already. It’s really true: When it rains, it’s force. Why not? The more entries you send, the more chances of winning – the more the many-er!!! Time for some Annie B-loving again:
I.T.A.L.Y. – I Trust and Love You
J.A.P.A.N. – Just Always Pray At Night
D.U.B.A.I. – Do Understand Business Always Important
S.H.A.R.J.A.H. – Seeing Him Always Refreshs Jolly Active Heart
U.A.E. – Uy, Awesome, Eh?
Q.A.T.A.R. – Quick Ask The Answer Right